Wasteland Campaign

Heading on to Ponce

Wednesday Group
In-game date: 12/27-1/2

At midnight, the group opens up the portal. Several of the new members question where all the gold came from. Hal gets a new arm of Ing and converts to Ing.

Razzo convinces Varia to invest in his cybernetics venture and Orlaaz decides to build a garage in Silotown. The mayor of Smoked Clam village talks to them. Mentions that a guy named Alistair was heading to the mountains. We eat his clams. Mentions that Smoked Clam village is 14 squares NE on the coast. He was headed to mountains and saw some angelic-looking monsters. They decide to save one more town in Stonehan and then head to Alistair’s location.

Razzo does a sweet wheelie.

The next morning, they travel. During the night, they see rocky desert as far to the north and east as can be seen. Razzo attempts to capture some ghosts, and captures a vulture instead. He rejoices. Jesse from the Fire Guild in Dogtown, they worship a tree and drink it’s sap. It heals all ailments and even regrows limbs. Also causes hallucinations. He mentions that he’ll be able to get some help for Silotown.

1/1 dawns. Razzo captures a warrior ghost. Sanura sips the sap, she starts having some interesting hallucinations.

1/2 dawns. Razzo believes that she is having two sets of thoughts going at the same time. They make it to the mountain range and see a huge waterfall with the town of Ponce surrounding it. They come across something kicking up dust. Seems like a line of ants. They want sugar. Sanura randomly sings about sugar and starts swinging her sword wildly. Ants wither, get smashed, get charred and melted, and such.

They see a man with a wagon drawn by two majestic stallions. He is crazy tall, wearing a leather unitard and a polearm. He has a big head and small horns with golden horncaps. He claims to have sugar. The ants take the sugar wagon. They no longer seem hostile. Razzo begins dancing and the mysterious cowman, Dakota, joins them. They head to Ponce, a bunch of white-robed people surround a pool of water.

Escape from the Life Engine Part 2: Electric Boogaloo
Seriously, like 7 critical hits for Harsk. He was blessed this day.

Saturday 12/5/2015
In game date: 12/25

As they look around, they see that they are not the only ones going through an ordeal. In the large room, they see dead bodies and dead hamster creatures. The elevator is gone and the door is being barricaded. They hear scratching and zombie noises coming from down in the hole. The piles of dead bodies seem to be moving and Harsk starts chopping away at the bodies, horrifying everyone. Several men attempt to stop Harsk and fail miserably, as all of the bodies begin to spring to life. Gullycloak attempts to see if the wheel/elevator is fixable, it isn’t and moves towards the door. Hatter tries to find some secret doors and finds none. Dale tries to convince the people to open up the barricade. One of Hatter’s mirror images disappears in a puff of smoke from a zombie attack. Various limbs attack the party. Gullycloak heals Dale as his mirror images start being destroyed.

The Hatter keeps searching for hidden doors as he moves towards the door. One of the giant gerbils moves toward the party. Harsk cartwheels past all the zombies and moves up the ramp. Gerbils bites away one of Hatter’s images. Hatter creates more images, as a zombie takes out another image. Dale creates more mirror images. Harsk manages to avoid a devastating critical with a critically successful acrobatic back hand spring. Dale tries to convince the guy to open the door. Harsk attempts to smash down the door and opens a big hole, seeing zombies as far as the eye can see. Gullycloak channels darkness and kills nearly all the zombies in a 30 foot radius.

The door smashes open and the zombies start to overflow the area. A shitload of flies burst out of the Hatter’s mouth. Dale uses a shocking grasp and kills the hamster. Harsk kills many of the zombie horde and Gullycloak climbs above the door and hides from the undead. The horde envelops the dwarves and Harsk. The dwarf sweepers are completely torn apart. Hatter runs into the swarm, hoping to be protected from the undead by Gullycloak. Harsk, in a berserker fury, manages to destroy the horde with alarming brutality. Gullycloak moves through the door. One zombie gets a hat put on him and lasers begin firing out of his eyes. The group gets a crazy dangerous idea. Gullycloak finds a gem and takes a nice stone bowl. Dale tries to grab the head of the zombie and manages to blast himself in the chest with a laser. Hatter finds a kiosk and takes tons of spices. Harsk grapples the laser zombie and plans to rip its head off.

Gully goes to a leather kiosk and finds some nice pouches and other stuff. Harsk rips the head off the zombie and blasts the moving zombie parts as he moves past the door. Gully finds some more stuff, like clothes and such. The zombies begin to reanimate and move slowly towards Harsk. The Hatter detects secret doors all over the place. Giant plants cover the bazaar. Gullycloak takes the bag of holding. Dale says that he’s super awesome. They hear sound coming from the stairs above and another zombie horde moving up towards them. Harsk tries to hand off the skull to one of Dale’s clones and it drops down the stairs. Harsk breaks through the door and they hear the familiar sound of shuffling zombies. A hat turns a zombie gerbil into something that loves him. Harsk kills the other zombie gerbils. Hatter throws a hat onto one of the zombies, turning it into a French sounding beautiful man.

Gullycloak has been looting various stores, honestly, I lost track of everything he stole. The zombies smash the rest of the bazaar.

And we blew up the transport system too, I guess

Wednesday 11/25/2015
In game date: 12/25-12/27

They travel to Stonefug/GobVegas and rest for the night. In front of them, the ground is basically solid rock. They see human size statues. They remember the cockatrice. Varia flies over and sees some arenas and networks of caves filled with cockatrices. Goblins everywhere.

The goblins ask if they are there for the cockatrice fights. The Flock controls the town directly for Cobalt Lightning, demon-aligned Harpies. They find out there is a cave directly under the coliseum, they’re told to bet on Redbeak.
At midnight, they’re told that the Batmen left because they’re unrealistic douchenozzles. We asked for Mayor Hal to take down the glyphs. And also Ocular Superiority sent a skinned Cyclops statue, saying that the group will face retribution, blah blah blah.

During the night, a fell wind appears and five women show up and take the statues, including a very attractive man with slicked black hair. We believe he is a demon. He loads up a few, and destroys the rest. He approaches the party and calls himself the Ladykiller. He claims that he has a harem of Harpies.

In the morning of 12/26, Garth and Hiita learn that the Flock is made of Harpies. Garth sees the cave is filled with gold, cockatrices, goblins, kobolds, and a pillar. The group starts going around and betting.

The mayor of Smoked Clam village, the treasurer of Doomwake Cinders, and the Ladykiller are all coming to see the fights. Garth finds out that Redbeak is the favorite to win and he realizes that it should be the one he charms into submission.

Apparently, the Ladykiller has eyes for Garth. Garth charms the cockatrice and they win tons of money. His earth elementals destroy the obelisk underneath the stadium. They go to the inn.

During the night, Sanura drinks with some pirate-looking guys from Smoked Clam. During the night, Garth has a magical experience and wakes up a changed man. They head in for breakfast. Garth notices the Ladykiller is a succubus and looks unsettlingly familiar. She hits on Garth relentlessly and challenges them to a battle asking for Garth if she wins, and gold if they succeed.

During the fight, Sanura is dominated and tries to convince the party to give up. Garth summons some hound archons to beat the shit out of the monster. Bets were made and a moral victory happened as well. The succubus then cursed Garth’s dick to forever remain dry (no seriously, we might need a remove curse on this one.)

Can You Ever Be TOO Deep?
Getting Off Of The Shaft

Saturday Group 11/21/2015
In game date: 12/25

As the mold is growing very quickly, a purple swirl of smoke appears in a corner of the room. A human? sitting at the table drinking tea with the skeletal remains of hare and dormouse. The giant immediately looks at him. The human? takes his hat off and throws it at the giant, he calls himself the Hatter.

The vegetation begins to grow into flowers and taking over half of the room. Some spores cover the party in yellow. The chairs and rugs begin to attack the party. Luca gets stomped by the creature and is knocked unconscious. The Hatter continues speaking poetry and creates seven mirror images. Several members book it towards the door. Harsk breaks down the door and Luca slowly bleeds out. A mechanical facsimile of Luca remains as Gullycloak is pinned. Harsk manages to rescue Luca, and Dale gets bodied by furniture. Gullycloak heals Dale, but gets grappled as well. Harsk manages to destroy all the furniture and frees the rest of the party. Gullycloak heals his mecha leg.

The room is being vastly overgrown by trees and vegetation. The group makes their way up the trees. They find that all of the bodies seem to be coming back to life. The Hatter turns one of the zombies into a beautiful maiden, which starts making out with the other zombie. Several of them fall during their climb. The dwarves are losing their battle against the zombies. Gullycloak gets his neck bitten by the zombies, and Harsk drops down and uses the momentum to launch himself to Gullycloak’s side. Harsk immediately gets mobbed by zombies, but murders them immediately. Dale heals Gullycloak and follows Harsk up the trees, and Gullycloak makes it up the trees. Harsk finally reaches the top of the shaft. Luca joins him, but Dale falls into unconsciousness. The Hatter manages to shock himself and damages himself. Gully makes it up to the top as well as the Hatter. Only Dale is being pulled up the shaft, except for a zombie who hitches a ride. Luca kicks the remaining zombie off the cliff.

While the group is out of immediate danger, they are by no means safe. What dangers will they face with so much dungeon left to escape?

Wrassling Pigs

Wednesday Group 11/18/2015
In game date: 12/22-12/25

In Cobalt Lightning’s lair, Kobolds on top, 10-20 very young and 5-10 older wise dragons at Cobalt Lightning’s lair. They are most definitely cowards. Plenty of tunnels that the dragons crawl through. We also know they hate red dragons and maybe fire.

The party decides to head to Coptown. Sanura tries to get sandstone sent to Silotown and Ragdar promises that he will after all of this is done. During the night, a lightning storm begins to happen and RAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNN.

12/23 dawns. They travel! Night passes without incident.
12/24 dawns. As they get closer to the town, they have to resurface and travel to the town. They see longhouses come out of the mud. Pigs everywhere. The group tries to get some pigs and some kobolds are near the perimeter. Razzo and Garth scout out the area and find out the obelisk is on the base floor inside the mesa. Night passes without incident.

12/25 dawns. Some kobolds riding pigs come into town. Merchant caravan is being loaded with pig meat. Group 1 ’ports in, smashes up the place, and ’ports out. They get into the drillcar and drive away.

Balls Deep
The Life Engine has Activated

In game date 12/25

They hear a bell ring from the top of the inn and a gathering of people surrounds the statue and a sermon begins about the Faceless One. Kreg decides to address the crowd and attempt to let the party past.

They decide to go through the door after convincing the guard to leave. They find a guy that can’t see without his glasses. They move and go down the hole. Harsk knocks one of the cultists out and they write a note pretending that he fell and hit his head. They find some sort of record player that plays smooth jazz. They find some sort of machine that powers something, Harsk decides to turn on the machine and a pillar of white light begins to fill the shaft and blinds several people.

They manage to get down the ladder and everyone’s sight is restored. The group sees cultists running around in scuba suits and they see a giant gem in the center that Harsk believes is the cause of the blast of light. They go down the stairs to the right and find some kind of fire magic machine. Kreg and Gullycloak ride down the stairs and fall straight down. The rest of the group keeps going down. They see a lava lamp like machine and see a bunch of crazy dwarflike creatures and find out the machines in the deep like to get down and dirty and make horrifying gearbabies. Braceface decides to lead them to “The Great Machine.” They find a masturbation machine and meet a guinea guard in the bazaar. They go down a cart elevator operated by pigmen.

They go down a hall filled with creepy paintings into a room with a giant gold statue. As Harsk steps into the room, the statue animates. He begins a battle with the group and immediately knocks out Kreg and pins Harsk with his foot as he feels something changing in his physiology. Gullycloak heals Kreg and Kreg falls through the trapdoor and sees some sort of gyroscope.

Harsk is freed from the foot and sees that his legs have changed into some sort of steampunk machinery. Dale manages to use mirror images to avoid attack, while Mira gets entangled in combat. Luca gets knocked down the hole unconscious and everyone else makes it into the hole. After some healing, everyone is awake. Harsk throws the orb into the gyroscope. They are fully healed and their hair grows wildly. The mold seems to grow and begins to overtake them.

While the Life Engine has been activated, they are still in danger.

Tranquilizing the Train Transportation

Wednesday Game

In game date: 12/21-12/22

As the group discusses the constitution, they discuss their next options. They plan to mess with Quhan’s infrastructure by destabilizing the fast travel train. They use all of Orlaaz’s nitrous to blast their way to Shakerlow over night. The next day, they send Wayne and Sanura in to turn off the gate. The group manages to kill off most of the Kobolds and rescues the dwarves.
They take one of the kobolds prisoner and ask him to give them all the details about Quhan’s lair. Garth has another plan in mind and charms the Kobold to do his bidding.

2 days until the destruction of Lumbertown

Creeping in the Catacombs

In game date 12/24-12/25

The party comes through the portal, they argue about how to cure Luca, but eventually cure him, and kill the starfish.

During the night, Harsk goes crazy and attacks Mira. He acts very weirdly and hurts himself and the party as the party tries to figure out what happened. They eventually find a doll who claims that he tried to steal Harsk’s body. They curbstomp the shit out of him even after he surrenders. The rest go back to sleep.

During the night, a group of guys with gross, flayed faces thank the group for killing the doll. The group decides to hang out with the cultists and find that the White Wizards are in charge of processing all the magic items they found on the dead bodies.

Knock Knock nearly terrifies the White Wizards by messing around with a horrifying marble.

They keep going down and are approached after Kreg jumps up on a statue. They are offered a chance to talk about the “machine.”

Government Set-Up

Wednesday Group

In game date 12/15-12/21

Garth and Wayne work together to double-time craft the items. Fenrir’s Cloak of Resistance and Sanura’s Belt of Dex. Mayor Hal informs them that hundreds of people have set up camp outside and we can’t possibly feed them all. The Gilded Dawn symbols drew them here. They find out that the sword they grabbed was very valuable and set it aside for the party.

We find out that Quhan is pissed and is going to destroy one of our neighbors as a show of force. We also find out that people think that we’re going to activate another Eldritch machine in the east. Sanura sees the Blue King’s symbol and Garth destroys it. Sanura sends out letters to Quhan and letters to various towns near Cobalt Lightning’s territory.

They find out that one of the huts that the party uses has been used for carrier pigeons and so they plan to carry out an investigation on who’s been a traitor to the cause.

On 12/21, the group feeds the starving masses and attempts to find jobs for everyone. They plan to contact the Gilded Dawn for help as this was not what we agreed to. That night, the Batmen of the Gilded Dawn agree to help organize the town if we make a town constitution to make sure that nobody is oppressed. We also find out that Lumbertown will be destroyed by Cobalt Lightning in 4 days if we do nothing.

So Much Morlock Puke
Prancy Prancy Puke Puke

Wednesday Group 10/21/2015
In-game 12/14-12/15

They manage to make it to Prisontown on the first day. They see a lot of Dwarven sentries and Razzo and Sanaura sneak to the fence. Razzo speaks to a rat and they return to the party. The party dimension doors to the roof. Sanaura’s shadow sneaks into the first floor. There’s a big area filled with bullets. They dimension door down into the warehouse, but Sanaura slips and draws attention to herself. Garth summons some dire rats to draw the guards’ attention and Sanaura sends her shadow to cause some more distraction. Razzo sends his automaton to check things out.

They finally manage to all get into the shell and hunker down for a while. Unfortunately, sleeping is less than likely to happen. But they manage to do so anyways. They make it on 12/15. They see through Fenrir’s clairvoyance that the area is swarming with Morlocks.

They manage a plan to have Razzo and Orlaaz distract while air elementals swarm up the shaft, trying to distract O.S. Sanura and Fenrir dimension door into the vault and take the page. Garth ports in and touches the two, ready to go. Sanura turns into stone thanks to O.S.’s eye ray. Wayne takes the rod and pops out of existence as Garth ports the three of them out. They pop into the minecart and heal Sanura and kill a Morlock.

Orlaaz has been ramming around, killing Morlocks, but rams his way out of the place.

The group, against all odds, seems to have survived their encounter with Ocular Superiority, got the page, stole a rod and a sword, and we managed to steal two drillcars as well!


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